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I AM -Void - Pournam -
05-02-08
‘Silence ….’
Just become aware now, where you all were for this
split second; or rather become aware of what you all were ‘feeling’/being so to
say. Because where you all were in that split second… was….*… what we describe
as Void… and yet it is now in this awareness of that unawareness that you
became aware, of where you all instantly, instantly went.
Whenever I speak of Void, Absolute, beyond
Consciousness, you will focus on the Heart chakra. Because Void cannot be spoken of - no
concept, no word, no idea, no image, nothing… is Void. So truly, through our sessions we speak of
it, we refer to it, we point to it, but that *… experience that all of you are
harnessing falls like a shadow on your Heart chakra.
And whenever I speak of Pure Consciousness, ‘I am’,
Awareness, Shiva focus somewhere on the top of your Crown chakra. Some of you will actually feel a pulsation,
movement. Some may feel a light, a glow;
some may just know…
And why do we speak so incessantly of the Void
these days? You must understand… Because as meditators in a finely highly,
honed, focused field of energy wherever you place your attention, your energies
follow and you begin to reside…over time… And when we keep speaking of,
describing - Void, though your mind is yes sometimes engaged in understanding, your
energy fields at your Hear chakra reside in Void. It’s the only way, while you are in the
human game. For whatever can be spoken of, referred to, described,
known, seen, viewed, witness, experienced, explored… is not Void. Therefore I wish you to view this
pictorially…all your understanding and knowing being sieved through a fine fine
fine mesh and the nothing that what falls through on to your Heart chakra… is……
Void.
***
We are going to energetically ‘explore’ Void today …in
little more detail. Because Void… aha… There are no words to go there, yet I will
try…
Void, is (a state of being) unaware of its Awareness. Yet inherently innate immanent within this
unawareness is awareness… Yet it is not aware of its Awareness. (These are
aspects of each other…of one beingness…not parts) No words, no words… so go with analogy. When you sleep in deep sleep you are
not aware… and yet it is the awareness of a fulfilled day… of having
experienced all that you chose, in that awareness, in that rest, in that fulfillment,
in that completion does you become or allow yourself to be blissfully unaware. The only way… you can be unaware in
your deep sleep… is in the awareness that you had a full complete day. It is this awareness that allows the
un-awareness of true sleep. Yes,
therefore is Void unaware and yet this rests on its awareness of All That It Is!
(I AM)
And just as you, in your analogy, are aware that what allows
you to go into this unawareness…is the awareness you had a fulfilled day,
a complete day, that you’ve done all that is; and in
that awareness do you fall into the un-awareness of sleep! Because if you aware that the day is incomplete; that
you are not fulfilled; that you haven’t done what you wanted to do…. you cannot
touch that un-awareness of deep sleep! No words… and yet we have pointed it out
beautifully to you. This one… sentence itself
you can mull on for a lifetime or lifetimes.
And therefore just like ‘you’ are fulfilled,
complete, pournam…so to say… and therefore do ‘you’ fall into the un-awareness
of deep sleep…. is Void fulfilled, complete, pournam and unaware… because it is aware that it
requires not to be aware anymore! That
It is fulfilled, complete, poornam!
And in that awareness, it needs not awareness and it becomes what
you call unaware. And thus is awareness immanent in its unawareness.Allow this to wordlessly beyond concepts fall on your Heart chakras… Thus
void is that part, that is wholly aware of All That It Is, (all That I Am) and in that fulfilment
it (I) need not to ‘be’ aware! No words…
But who is speaking thus? From where are we speaking,
who is describing void and its un awareness…? Because anytime there is speaking about,
describing, pointing, knowing, witnessing, viewing, understanding,
experiencing, exploring - it is- Pure Consciousness …awareness of That
unawareness void …and not void itself!
And therefore it is Pure consciousness…awareness of
That I Am… who or what you call God, whom you call Ishwar. The reason you do not call Void your Ishwar
and God is because you cannot talk of it, you cannot describe it, there is no -
way - to go there…it is in your terms beyond ….God …knowing,
describing…anything at all u can see label feel etc etc !
And because it is through ‘I Am’, through Pure
consciousness that you can go beyond into That YOU ARE…even beyond ‘I Am’ is it
humanity’s God,. But even ‘I Am’ consciousness is an illusion, the
primary illusion or separation. But by
residing there, staying there, being there, can you move into…
When you are wholly aware, wholly fulfilled, wholly
complete, POURNAM, when you reside in All
That I Am… do you move into…..*
***
And what is this Pure consciousness, Awareness, that
allows Void to remain unaware…? For the very reason for Pure consciousness
to exist IS so that Void may become aware…of all that it is and in that
fullness of knowing and beingness …remain unaware and at rest. It is Pure consciousness which (in
your terms) is … learning, growing, developing or… exploring, expanding experiencing and being
fulfilled and complete …
And this ‘I Am’ you will see today from two
‘points’. Firstly: ‘I am’ - Pure consciousness, God, Ishwara, Shiva -
Shakti, Serpentine. Pure
consciousness which chooses to explore ‘All That Is’ every aspect, every
nuance. And when it is complete,
fulfilled, pournam it resides ‘back’… into… the Void. (actually this is not a linear process,
but yr words don’t allow us to speak any other way- it is happening simultaneously…the
exploring and being fulfilled and complete and
thus awareness and its unawareness are simultaneous -pulsation)
And secondly all of you, as secondary points of the
same ‘I am’, same consciousness, your very reason to be is to experience, expand,
explore, learn, play the game, create differences - that’s your reason (as
the secondary point of focus of pure consciousness) to be!
And when it is done, when there are no more questions, when there is fulfillment,
when you feel pournam…you have done… played out…. what you as secondary
consciousness chose to do/be for primary consciousness… and thus you merge back
into pure consciousness and then…… Void…
And yet there is no ‘you’, there is no
secondary point of focus. It is only
‘I’, Pure Consciousness, exploring ‘All That Is’ through different eyes, portals, windows,
points of focus…! Literally like you seeing to your left or right or
diagonal or back…there are not four of you! Therefore it is not you who chooses
when you’re full and complete and have no questions or desires because there is
no ‘you’. But when I... finish, one
aspect of my being, that I was, through what you call ‘you’ - you automatically
begin what you call the spiritual journey, the deeper seeking. The desiring to improve your life, the
desiring to understand more and then…to move beyond even that beingness into
that I AM…and then do you fall into this place where I am too rests,
surrenders, falls asleep, fulfilled and complete and replete…
***
We will give you an analogy which we have given you
often and yet it is the very best. Do not allow what is familiar to pale an
importance. The playing… of the board game.
How clear you are that it is ‘you’ who’s playing the game. That Hamsi is playing the game. Hamsi
is clear its NOT the counter playing the game.
You are so clear there is no doubt within you and you will consider this
analogy silly! How would the counter play a game without you? And in this analogy
Hamsi is the ‘I am’ - Pure Consciousness and the counter is
whom you call Hamsi - is this understood? The counter is
akin to the current you! It does not exist separately from you the player
surely! Does the counter know where to
go? Does the counter have any will of it’s own? None whatsoever! It’s completely, completely… the larger Hamsi,
the game player, ‘I am’.
And by residing in this ‘I am’, more and more will
you.., become one with ‘All That Is’, you will become Pure consciousness,
you will become God, you will become Ishwara, yes all of that, yes, but so un-important. Because when/then complete,
fulfilled, pournam… will you go beyond. There are very, very few seekers seeking to go
beyond ‘I am’. Because in ‘I am’ you
have all… that you can have and be and experience and explore and love and
bliss and joy and… knowledge. And yet
there is a beyond for those handpicked…
***
We gave you last time an analogy… of the mother
as the ‘I am’ - happy, looking beautiful, her husband has come home. Many gifts, successful deals, good food,
beautiful home - that is your ‘I am Consciousness’. And her children playing a game, fighting,
screaming, crying, rising up and falling down, bound by the rules of the game -
that is current ‘You’. And the mother symbolizes ‘I am’ ….and all
you need to do is take your focus to the mother. And how does that happen beloveds? How does
that happen? We will again give it to
you through a picture. Because you all
are the children playing the game, you all are involved in the game, in the ups
and downs. You’re bound by the rules,
you’re engrossed, sometimes your laughing, sometimes your crying, your
mastering the game and then suddenly your attention goes on your mother… and
then suddenly you realize - ‘Oh my God, my father has come home’, suddenly you realize
they’ve got so may gifts, suddenly you realize what lovely food is being cooked
in the kitchen - where is your attention going? Where is your attention going?
It’s paling… from the game. It’s moving from the game automatically,
only by the act of putting your attention on the mother, on the father, on the
gifts, on the food…
Put yourself in those games, don’t make these empty
words. You’re playing, your engrossed,
you’re going up and down and losing and winning, the rules matter. Suddenly your focus is only on your mother
and then on your father and then on the food and then on the gifts and then you
actually hear them that they’ve had a great successful deal! And your attention is almost not on the
game, it doesn’t even matter, what your playing, whether you’re winning or
losing, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter! It matters not …the rules
become redundant… And then your
father and mother are talking about this beautiful new home they’ve got, and
your attention is just sliding more and more there. You cannot now keep your attention on
your board game! On its ups and
downs, whether you were winner or loser, it matters not! How? How? How can you
do this quantum leap? Purely, by putting your focus on ‘I am’. And that is why we are urging you session
after session… Those of you who are
going to come for this are done with the playing of the game. And its not ‘you’
who has chosen this but pure consciousness is finishing its foray through you! But of course it will not be immediate, it
will be like those children - enjoying the game , attention moving, coming
back, moving more wholly…game not mattering…! And thus you are going to find yourself
saying increasingly - ‘It doesn’t matter’.
Because your attention is on … the mother, the father, the gifts, the
food, the home - in our terms on the love, joy, bliss, wisdom, empowerment
of ‘I am… that I am’.
We have already given you tools through the weeks of how
to keep your focus on ‘I am’ …through the Sun, the Guru’s eyes, the mother -
add this to your analogies. Allow
your attention to slide along… and then that child is suddenly…only with the
parents even while he’s in the board game, doing the motions. He… is become one with the parents and doing
whatever motions the game requires for the sake of the others! It is a process, it is a process and yet it
is leaps and it is leaps. It is
automatic, it is automatic, you just.. fall there!
A flower just blossoms, a fruit just ripens…and in that
automatically ceases the need to be and so falls off to start afresh…
***
And yet if you are saying an ‘i’, the personal
‘i’ have become one with ‘I am that’ - you haven’t beloveds… Because you are saying ‘i’ - Divyaa have
become one with ‘I am’, then the Divyaa exists.
Yes, but you will begin with that, you will begin with that till there
will come a point where you will not be able to say that, think that, feel
that, be that. You will be ‘I am
that’ looking at the Divyaa-self - subtle difference, but a one hundred percent
(100%), Three hundred and Sixty (360) degree difference.
Just like when you marry…you say I divyaa am part of
kummar family…then over time it becomes I the kummar family have an aspect
called divyaa
***
We will put on the music. You will focus on ‘I am’,
you will not ‘focus’ on Void because you cannot truly! But by residing and remaining in the ‘I am’…
the fruit will ripen… the flower will blossom… deep sleep will happen…
And we will give you an analogy to work with
during the music - a diya, lit - in it’s oil lamp. The flame is your
IAM and the earthen dia yr personal consciousnes… now
focus on the diya, on the flame, the ‘I am’- and observe automatically
the oil… is disappearing, getting soaked… its vanishing. But where is your
focus? On the flame! Automatically, the oil - the personal
Consciousness, the field in which you play… evaporates. And then the
diya - ‘I am’, flickers out into……*… That. The diya is no longer aware, but it
flickered out because it completed itself, fulfilled it’s reason to be, soaked
up all it’s oil…
Focus on the ‘I am’ - on the diya, the flame, the Sun,
the mother, the Guru’s eyes; make your own analogies - become the mountain -
and the ‘I am’ as the mountain-tip, the rest is…
(Music starts… Om pourna mada…) 3 DIFFERENT PIECES
WERE PLAYED TO SYMBOLICALLY REPRESENT THE: I AM FOCUS- THE UNAWARNESS OF VOID-
MAYA AND ITS ADREANLIN OF PRAKRITI …LIFE
Some more analogies… so that you can keep your focus
on ‘I am’ and understand the process -
You, a drop of water - red color drop, fall into a
bucket of water. You are the drop
initially and yet as you bleed through and merge and become the red water of
the bucket - you are no longer the drop, but you are the red water….
You are the sugar, which is put into what we’ll call
the halwa. And yet as it is cooked and
mixed and you become the halwa, NOT the sugar within it. Your focus shifts to being the halwa.
When you get married - you Hamsi - marry and
enter this home, this new name, this new family, this new larger beingness but
you experience it as hamsi….but over the years you become the family of whom Hamsi
is just one aspect…
When my daughter goes to Notre Dam and says “I am an
Indian in Notre Dam” - it soon changes over years to we Notre Dam has… so many
Indians. So subtle, so gradual and
yet are you understanding beloveds, moving from personal consciousness into ‘I
am’.
But how? How did all of these happen? By the beingness
of the Notre Dam experience. By your beingness
in the marital home….
This is where all of you are headed and therefore see
within you, in the centre of the circle - a pillar of light, like a finger,
pointing up, a finger – of whom we will call Krishna. And atop the finger - a
Sudarshan chakra and a little bit of the finger… distinct over that
chakra… Keep your attention firmly on
the tip of the finger, let your base centre of attention be the Sudarshan
chakra, let the rest of the finger below be all that you ‘have been’. Keep your - focus - on the top, on the tip,
on the Sudarshan chakra, on the light.
And you can revolve and you can rotate and you can flip and it matters
not, it matters not. You are the diya’s
flame, you are the tip of the Sudarshan chakra.
As you keep your focus here all other aspects of your personal consciousness
will play themselves out. ‘I am…That… I
am’.
As the meditation ended and eyes were opening…
I’m not the flower in this garden, I am the garden
which has a flower.
I am not Neeta and Hamsi and Monica
who come to Tuesdays, I am Tuesdays which contains Hamsi and Monica
and Neeta.
– ‘My’ life… is Pure Consciousness playing itself
out. It is Pure Consciousness’s mirrors,
not mine. How does it matter what the
mirrors are? - They are not mine! How
does it matter what the learning is? - It’s not mine! It all belongs to Pure
Consciousness. Consciousness chooses to play itself and experience itself. And therefore it creates a board game! How can Consciousness experience itself in
pure bliss? Don’t you create a
board game, don’t you put snakes and ladders and opposition and partners?! And so Consciousness puts it a..ll! And each of you become its secondary point of
Consciousness(like the counter) and you play Its game out. And you talk of beliefs and you talk of
mirrors and you talk of learning and karma its not yours beloveds, its not
yours - it is Mine! Once you are beyond
personal consciousness .. beyond the game… its rules don’t apply- no karma no
cause and effect….. it is only in the game that they yes ‘work or apply….And
the moment you move into this
Welcome home, welcome home beloveds, welcome home!
Each one has a guide working with you - in your terms,
within your rules of the game.
You can call it a removal of veils - in your terms, from your rules,
they’re unravelling your knots… your gatths, along the chakras. And yet they are leaving some in place - because
I CHOOSE… to continue the game, for a little while longer, through each of you.
Understand that when you talk of your personal energy
fields, when you talk of your seven chakras; your seven chakras are only your
personal energy field; the seventh one somewhat taking you somewhat out of your
energy field into… the vaster energy.
And therefore when you talk of unified chakras - what unification are
you talking about… But the unification of your personal energy field! Do not keep your focus on that process of
unifying- your bringing yourself down! Do not bother about what’s happening
with your seven chakras, you’ve gone beyond that! That’s happening within the game!
What has happened is at each chakra - you let go of
ignorance, you let go of separation. From the Root chakra - you let go of your
separation - of your earliest caveman days fighting for survival, physical,
property, land. As you move up the separation
of sexual activity, partners, fears. As
you move up - the separation of power and the heart of love and relationships
as you go up to the Throat chakra. Your
words, my words, his words, this master, that master - as you move up… to the 3rd
Eye. As you align you do not see anyone
as separate. At the 7th do
you begin to merge with what we call the larger energy field.
Focus on the end result. Focus… on your unification with ‘All That
is’, of Three Hundred and Fifty Two chakras (of omega to alpha), ‘I am That I am’.
See your energy fields, glowing, vibrant… emanating to
the world around you - ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I
am’. Get up in the morning knowing that
‘I am That I am’. Go to sleep in the
night knowing ‘I am That I am’. Every
moment ‘I am That I am’. Use analogies,
use the tools, remain - firmly in ‘I am That I am’. I’m not the flower, I am the garden; I’m not the Monica, I’m the Tuesday; I’m not the board game, I’m the mother; I’m
not the life, I’m the Sun; ‘I am That I am’
You’ll can open your eyes, because this stuff is just
coming and coming and coming and coming and….
I’m not the leaf, I’m the breeze. I’m not even the breeze, I’m the
coldness……
You’re not Yasmin and Hamsi and Geeta
and Nikhu, you’re the circle…….
Devika/Vedika… Susheela…Susheela…
gently open your eyes... Nikhu…
(Tape stopped)
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